Issue 022: Plan B Ain’t Settling—It’s Surrender
*cues "Another Surrender" by Woman Evolve Worship*
You know that trending reel where people talk about how Plan A was to be married by 26, have a house by 28, and kids by 30? I played along last night and made one that said:
“Plan B: 32, auntie AF, and loving every second.”
My IG audience ate it up. Thousands of views in less than 24 hours. People really resonated with it or just thought the babies were cute l0l
But here’s the thing—I never actually had a “Plan A.” Not like that. I didn’t map out when I’d get married, buy a house, or have kids. I was mostly focused on building my business and thought the rest would just… fall into place somehow. So when I made that reel, I was following the trend—but it stirred up something deeper in me.
Because yeah, I’m 32 (almost 33), single as hell, no kids, not even close to marriage, and not in a financial position to buy a home, yet. And while I’ve come to peace with where I’m at, I’d be lying if I said it never gets to me. Some days, it really does.
But what I don’t want is for people to look at my life and think I “settled” into the role of the auntie just because Plan A didn’t work out. That’s not my story.
If anything, the fact that I didn’t have rigid plans gave God room to do His thing. To reroute me, guide me, and make space for a different kind of purpose. I may not have birthed kids of my own, but I’ve been given so many opportunities to mother—my nephews, my niece(s), my godbabies. Every maternal instinct in me still gets used. And I know that’s not by accident.
I feel like God looked at my life and said,
You might not go the traditional route, but I’m still gonna use you. Still gonna let your love shape lives. Still gonna put you where you’re needed most.
And the flexibility of my life? That’s been the biggest blessing. Just this week was my first full week not nannying my nephews during the day since they’ve both started daycare. I’ve been adjusting—cleaning up, reorganizing my space, slowly getting back into work mode. It’s been bittersweet, but mostly sweet. I’m proud of them. And I’m proud of me.
Now, with their parents planning to move back closer to Dallas soon, they’ve asked me to come with them—to stay close. And I can. Because my life is set up that way. Even though I just re-signed my lease and money is tight, my family is part of my village, just like I’m part of theirs. They’ll help me move. We help each other show up.
This is what surrendering my timeline has created:
A life that may not follow tradition, but is full of alignment.
And I’ll be honest—I used to be more comfortable in the background. Supporting others. Building the foundation. That’s where I thrive. But over time, I’ve learned how to step into the front too. To be visible. Vulnerable. Present. Now, I get to do both. I support others and I show up for myself.
So no, I didn’t “settle” for being the fun auntie.
I surrendered to the life God is still writing for me.
And I’m falling more in love with it every day.
Stay blessed, stay creative, and stay aligned!
All is well,
Ashlee
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